Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Magic Words

"Words have power. Printed words, indeed, can arouse the most potent emotions. They can excite joy, passion, peace, and rage within their readers." ~Scott Cunningham

I think that's what spells is really all about, the power of words. I've seen it time and time again, manifesting itself in multiple aspects of my life. And the more you look, the more you see. Funny how that works.

I have seen first hand the various powers of words. I saw it in the piles of bodies, lying in unearthed mass graves, left to bake in the sun of Iraq. I saw it in the tears of a my wife as she accepted my proposal. I saw it in the peaceful eyes of a dying women. I saw it in the Leaf which was engraved on her tombstone.
Our tradition teaches "the proper expression of will," and I have come to recognize the potent fertility of my own words. Scott's quote has really hit home with me recently. I have repeatedly had my potent emotions aroused in the process of completing certain Christian based academic requirements.

But again, I also see the benefits of this painful process as well. When I speak about our belief and practice of spell craft, I emphasize the power of words because the words you use create the world you live in, just as much as the words you DON'T use. In a Boundaries and Ethics class I learn the incredible power of one of the most magical words in existence, "NO." And whenever I have spoke at the prisons on this, someone has always said, "If I had used that word, I wouldn't be here..."

Scott's quote again struck home when I received words from several different sources notifying me that one my colleagues in the Pagan community has been hard at work making slanderous allegations in a continuing effort to follow through with a threat to discredit me. *Sigh*

But lest we not forget the other side of that coin, the magic words of others. How powerful are the words of others? How much influence do those words have in the creation of the world you live in? How much influence do you allow them to have? In remembering that I have a choice in the matter, I have again become the King of Wands. Not all of them, just the ones in my kingdom.


Celestite said...

Not related to this post....I really enjoyed listening to you today on Zaracon's blogtalk radio show.

Heather Awen said...

I have PTSD too. From being abandoned to the street when I was 14 and having to survive. It lasted for 6 years, the rapes, the beatings, I saw a murder sone by my friend's boyfriend, the drug dealers, the pimps, the hitmen.... What's weird is that in that world, people are really into Wicca and neopaganism. One boyfriend used to beat me while screaming about Carlos Castenada. Due to my hippe Hindu Buddhist Love Compassion childhood, I always felt so sorry for all the abusers, and tried to love them, because everyone is good and I am you and you are me and I am the walrus.

Because I had no idea I was abused (like most long term trauma survivors) I was told by the doctor when I was 20 that I had bipolar, just a very weird from of it that didn't have real mania and the depression was anziety. He could have said anxiety disorder, but bipolar is very trendy. My first therapist heard 10 minutes from me about nightmares and then told me my dad raised me in a Satanic cult, and that I had blocked memories. She handed me Louise Hay "Blame the victim" books and made me fall apart. 19 years of crazy doctors who think they are shamans and endless pills that do not make the fear go away, but do give me tardive dyskonesia and weight gain, when suddenly a doctor actually talks to me and realizes I am a trauma survivor. That was 2 years ago.

Mindfulness helps me a lot, I fought it, but it works. ACT, a form of therapy that's very Buddhist, works for me. Nothing else did.

Heather Awen said...

My mother thinks that people who trance and shamanic journey easily are good at dissociation.

I don't know, but I do know trauma sucks. It steals parts of our futures and presents by invading us with the past. I think what makes it worse is the shame. Wondering if you'll have a flashback or panic attack if you go to the party, you just don't go. Or if when you tell someone you don't work because of disability and they ask what your disability is (people really hate anyone who has a disability because of the $700 a month SSI we get to live on) and if you say "PTSD" they ask what the trauma was, and I can't understand why that's any of their business.

I have been saying that the only good thing that might come out of these wars is that people with PTSD and TBI will get some quality care. Already when I say PTSD people don't look at me like I am weak like they did in the 90s, they look at me like I am a Marine. But the VA hasn't been all that excellent for vets I know with PTSD either.

They say that we have to give out trauma meaning. That's hard for me. But I think for most of us it means we try to alieviate the pain of others. That is one reason I send you all those books. A part of me as i work in recovery on feeling what I really feel, that part of me doesn't want the people in prison to have my books. The people who raped and beat me, who beat their girlfriends and fed their kids ketchup sandwhiches, took their kid's pee in for drug testing, those people went to jail (and 12 step meetings, one reason I avoud 12 step meetings). And as someone who had to take care of her abusers to survive on the street or die alone and cold in a dumpster, I feel awful about giving someone who dealt drugs or beat their kids great books.

I am a liberal, born and bred, I know the stats on prisons being at overcapacity, the gang wars, the money GE and others are making off the privitization of prison, and the PTSD of prison, the no drug treatment, the vast amount of drugs available, how the US has more of its population in the justice system than any other nation, the racism, and the majority being drug offences. I know prison doesn't work. Too many people from that awful time in my life went to prison and told me about it, and I read the articles.

Am I taking care of my abusers still? No. Because this time I am in control. But it is still something I worry about, having a very long history of having to care for abusive men due to no money to leave.

I wish there were PTSD support groups like people think there are.